21 day fast

Pastor is calling for a 21 day fast, just for people to draw closer to God.  No particular fast, but they have really been asking we pray about what we are going to fast, not just say "Oh I'll fast xxxx-xxx" without talking to God about it.

So I prayed... and prayed.... and a few days later prayed again...   Oh don't get me wrong, God answered, the first time.  I just didn't want to listen.   Almost as soon as I prayed the Daniel Fast came into my mind.  Now the Daniel Fast is very strict, from what I find it is basically vegetables, fruit, beans, and water.  (hence why I kept praying, just in case)  I'm not perfect, and I don't know if I will be able to follow it perfectly, but there are some things I have been asking God for (begging/asking same difference) and I want to follow up the prayer with fasting, something I should have done long before now.  But if I fall, my plan is to get right back up and on the fast, no failure.

My expectations during this time of fasting is to reach a new level with God.  I cannot wait to see the changes in my life, even if He doesn't directly answer my prayers.  I want to be closer to Him!!

Merry Christmas

I hope that everyone had a wonderful Christmas this year.  I hope you were blessed beyond belief with time with your family and friends.  I hope that you took the time to revel in said family and friends and not make too much hussle and bussle out of the holidays.

We had a wonderful Christmas "season".  Our Christmas celebrations/dinners start on the 23rd.  We attended the Ever's Christmas dinner.  It was a lot of good times, a lot of reminicing went on that night.  Memories are a wonderful thing, make lots of them.  Later that night we went to look at the lights at Sowell's, they were beautiful, I don't know why but Christmas lights are so amazing to me.  The 24th we had 2 dinners, and had to skip one.  We went to Grandma Macks for lunch, and had a great time with our family on that side.  Very busy and bustling with a lot of people!  Then we went home for just a little bit, long enough to cozy up to a nice nap.  We got up and went to Grandma Joy & Grandpa Tubby's for Christmas with that side of my family.  We spent the night talking about the past and present.  I don't get to see that side of my family hardly at all so I always enjoy my time with them.  We missed the Payne dinner because of time conflicts.  But luckily I get to see most of them at the Ever's dinner so I still saw them!  Then Christmas morning we slept in late, got up and got dressed, started making the beans for dinner, and then opened our presents. I so enjoy watching Ken's face when he is opening gifts.  I like knowing that I was able to pick out perfect gifts!  Then we went to Mom & Pops (ken's parents), We celebrated with them, Amanda, Ben, Dakota & Aiyana.  Then on to Mom & Dad's (my parents) where we celebrated with that side of our family.  We enjoyed watching ALL of our nieces and nephews open presents (and Amanda open Savannah's since she isn't here yet).  The pure joy in a child's eyes during Christmas is a wonderful thing. 

Most of all, I enjoyed thinking about how wonderful our Jesus is to us.  He came to this earth, birthed to a virgin to die for our sins.  I wonder how it felt to know the greatness He was going to do one day.  I struggle with the thought of death, so to me it is scary to think about dying.  Did He go through that to?  He would have KNOWN he was going to die, and to die a brutal death, was it scary to Him, like it is to me?  :::Sorry, I got side tracked::::   This time is to celebrate Jesus coming to earth to live like one of us, so He could die to save us.  Even if this isn't the time that he actually was born, that is okay.  It isn't about the Christmas trees, the lights, the ornaments, the presents, etc.  This time should be about Jesus, and reflecting on all He did for us.  I hope you all took that time to reflect. 

Why I need to do it

My goal is to loose 50 pounds between now and this time next year.  That is VERY do-able, at a little over 4 pounds a month. Especially if I get off my lazy butt and start exercising. 

First, the reasons WHY I need to:

• I want to make it through a day without my back killing me
• I want to be healthy when I finally get pregnant
• I want to live a long life!
• I want to be able to run a 5k
• I want to be an example to people around me

How I am planning on doing it:

• Eat at home!
• Cut out the majority of breads, all of the sweets
• Cut back portion sizes
• Exercise!!  With Jillian Michael's 30 day shred
• Start doing the Couch 2 5K program

I am just going to take it one day at a time.  I think my goal can be obtained easily without struggling to much.  I just know that I need to do it. I have come a long way, but I still have a long way to go, that is for sure.

Where do I fall?

I was reading tonight in Mark, the parable of the seeds.  We've all heard and read it, many times I'm sure. The farmer sows some seed, some falls on the path where people walk, some in shallow soil, some in thorns, and some in fertile soil.  Jesus explains it to his discples as the seed = the Word of God.  The soil being ME and how I accept the word. 

Am I like the footpath that the seed doesn't even go into my spirit? Satan snatches it before it has the chance. 

Am I like the shallow soil?  I accept the Word, and am overjoyed by it, but when troubles come my way it washes away quickly because there are no roots.

 Do I have thorns in my life that grow up over the Word of God that chokes it out and kills it?

Or am I fertile soil for God's Word?  Am I cultivating an enviroment where God's Word reigns in my life?  Do I take care of my "soil"?  Unfortunately, though I am still working toward it, I don't think I've got good fertile soil yet.  But I am cultivating my soil.  I want God's Word to go in me, I want to take it in and it make a difference in my life.  I want to be able to take His Word, and give it to others, so when the farmer (Jesus) comes, I have produced a crop "thirty, sixty or a hundred times the amount of seen planted".

Lesson's in life

So I was told today that I wasn't chosen for the positon I put in for.  You know, the one that I have been working for 2 months, and will be working the next month. They decided it would be better to hire from the outside. We'll see. It is going to be tough. 

At the beginning of this journey I gave it all to God.  I didn't want to stress or worry over it, so I gave it to Him.  I told Him if he would take it that I would trust Him with whatever outcome came my way.  I cannot take it up and say "oh poor me" just because the outcome didn't come out the way I wanted it to!  I am still trusting me to put me in the right position, wherever that may lead me. 

Special Scripture

Have you ever gotten to a giving up point? I have been praying for a certain thing for... years. To the point that I feel like I'm begging. And boy do I hate begging.  It's been a while for me to pray for this certian thing, I mean, God knows my heart's desire right?  Then I read this scripture that changed all of that for me.  Maybe it is meant to help someone else too.

Matthew 7:7-8
"Keep on asking, and you will recieve what you ask for.  Keep on seeking, and you will find.  Keep on knocking, and the door will be opened to you.  For everyone who asks, recieves.  Everyone who seeks finds.  And to everyone who knocks, the door will be opened."

Keep on praying - even if it feels like the 1,000,000th time bringing it before God.