My struggle lately has been with giving up. More a sense of protection, a wall going up than anything. I told Ken the other night, I just don't want to have kids. Needless to say, he didn't believe me. But I think I did a fairly good job of convincing us ha ha. It's just easier to make it my decision, rather than have that decision taken away from us. Whoever is going the taking away (God, science, sickness, etc), I don't want it to be anyone's choice but ours. So ... that being said, I'm over wanting kids. Three, almost 4 years is enough pity partying and hurt and crying and blah blah blah.
I'm just over it. My wall is officially up on this subject and I'm done. I'm not saying it doesn't hurt, but I'm done, I can move on, enjoy my nieces & nephews and all of my friends children. We are blessed with plenty of children in our lives, and that is just the way it is going to be.
