It has been a rough couple of weeks lately, so rough I cannot even explain or rationalize alll of my emotions. The biggest thing that has been going over and over in my head is the argument of what is worse... No Hope or False Hope?
I have not fought that arguement out to the end yet, and I'm not sure that I ever will, because it all feels empty, both options seem pointless with endless pain.
I feel like God has left me alone and questioning. I have so many questions and stuggles. I have been strong so long and I don't think I can push through it any more. Eventually, I will move on, I don't have much of a choice.
